Everything's Five-by-Five


  1. Have no fear, fellow Lions fans! If Stafford gets hurt, we have two capable backups for the position of Goofy-Looking Fraternity Brother Type.

    Have no fear, fellow Lions fans! If Stafford gets hurt, we have two capable backups for the position of Goofy-Looking Fraternity Brother Type.

  2. 120memories:

    The Presidents of the USA “Lump” video featured on 120 Minutes, 1995

  3. "But if I get into the trash can while Kevin is in the shower, am I really a good boy?”

    "But if I get into the trash can while Kevin is in the shower, am I really a good boy?”

  4. I didn’t post anything after brunch yesterday but we went to the American Art Museum for the last day of the Pop Art exhibit. Then we went to the National Portrait Gallery (which is in the same building) for the American Cool exhibit and also checked out the presidential portraits. Then we barhopped but my phone was low on juice so I didn’t take pictures of that. If I had, I would have gotten a picture of the Disco Fries (poutine, basically) we ordered at ChurchKey which were amazing.

    Edit: I feel like I should note that I didn’t realize photography wasn’t allowed in the Pop Art exhibit until after I had taken those pictures with my phone. Photography was allowed in the presidential gallery so those pictures are totally kosher. It was not allowed in the American Cool exhibit, however, so the Hunter S. Thompson photo was taken with full knowledge that I was breaking the rules. I wasn’t using flash, though, so I don’t really feel bad about it.

  5. Brunch update: chicken and waffles with white gravy.

    Brunch update: chicken and waffles with white gravy.

  6. I read several dozen stories a year from miserable, lonely guys who insist that women won’t come near them despite the fact that they are just the nicest guys in the world.

    ..I’m asking what do you offer? Are you smart? Funny? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? OK, now what do you do to demonstrate those attributes to the world? Don’t say that you’re a nice guy — that’s the bare minimum.

    “Well, I’m not sexist or racist or greedy or shallow or abusive! Not like those other douchebags!”

    I’m sorry, I know that this is hard to hear, but if all you can do is list a bunch of faults you don’t have, then back the fuck away..

    ..Don’t complain about how girls fall for jerks; they fall for those jerks because those jerks have other things they can offer. “But I’m a great listener!” Are you? Because you’re willing to sit quietly in exchange for the chance to be in the proximity of a pretty girl (and spend every second imagining how soft her skin must be)? Well guess what, there’s another guy in her life who also knows how to do that, and he can play the guitar. Saying that you’re a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn’t make you sick. You’re like a new movie whose title is This Movie Is in English, and its tagline is “The actors are clearly visible”.

  7. Watching sports makes me hungry

    Michigan football has a DE named Taco Charlton

    Arsenal have a LB named Nacho Monreal

    Is it time for brunch yet?

  8. I’m not a brunch person

    I am firmly in the breakfast camp, if there are such camps. But I’ll be going to brunch later with Katy and two of her friends who are in town from New York because they are brunch people and I am a good boyfriend. I’m actually kind of excited about it because I was checking the menu ahead of time and there are some tantalizing options. I guess what I’m most curious about, though, is how do people wait until 1pm to have their first meal of the day? I waited until almost 8am to have breakfast this morning and I was friggin’ starving. 

  9. Success! It took slightly longer than advertised and admittedly wasn’t exactly what I ordered, but they brought Popeyes to me so I’m happy.

    Success! It took slightly longer than advertised and admittedly wasn’t exactly what I ordered, but they brought Popeyes to me so I’m happy.

  10. I found an app that will bring Popeyes Chicken to my drunk ass

    It’s called Postmates and it will get five stars from me if they deliver as promised.